


Summer Days

by princehamlet



Category: Hamlet - Fandom, Shakespeare - Fandom
Genre: Modern AU, Other
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-05-22
Updated: 2016-05-22
Packaged: 2018-06-10 03:05:59
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,475
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6937066
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/princehamlet/pseuds/princehamlet
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>@alexfinkes on tumblr suggested for a fic prompt, "omg what about a huge water gun fight that laertes and hamlet take way too seriously and start literally drawing out attack plans and assigning code names and stuff". So here that is.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Summer Days

Ophelia let out a surprised yelp when the rubbery water balloon blew itself to smithereens against the small of her back, the water trickling down the back of her legs. Dainty hands came to press against her stinging skin, and although she was giggling and ecstatic, she couldn't hide the stern tone of her voice. "-- Laertes! That was just cold!"

"The act or the water?" Her brother remarked slyly, weighing another balloon in his hand and giving her a very sinister look.  
She read that look, and held out her finger warningly. " _No...!_ Laertes --!" She said, but it was too late. He chucked the balloon at her, and it exploded against her arm.  
Ophelia fell on the warm grass, laughing and frustrated. "It's _cold!_ " She shrieked, her beautiful voice carrying out into the clear sky. 

Gertrude smiled from afar as she watched the teenagers playing. It livened up Elsinore in her Hamlet's absence to see them enjoying the warmth of the summer day. Denmark was not blessed with many hot days -- them taking advantage of the sun and the water made warm, youthful flowers bloom in her heart. Basking in a shady spot at a safe distance (from whence Hamlet [the son Hamlet, not the husband] could not get any water on her), Gertrude sipped at a glass of lemonade and casually read one of her beat up romance novels. She was to play the unsupervising chaperone for the afternoon. 

Hamlet offered Ophelia a hand, smiling. She looked stunning in a one-piece floral-patterned swimsuit, her ridiculously curly orange-dyed hair pulled back into one big fluffy ponytail. Her sun-kissed freckles stood out against her dark skin, and her pearly white smile stood out even more. She was like the sun, and the friends around her couldn't help but orbit in her beauty. Ophelia accepted his pale hand, pulling herself up. 

"That _is_ cold," Hamlet exclaimed, in observation of Ophelia's water-slicked hand touching his. Discreetly, he wiped it against his thigh, trying to bring the warmth back on his hand. "What did you do, Laertes? Fill up those balloons from the _river_ or something?"

"That would take, like, a billion years." Laertes said. "Heads up!" And chucked another balloon. 

Hamlet, as if it was a bullet and they were in war, blocked Ophelia's frame with his back and took it, the harsh blow striking right in the middle. He groaned. "-- OW! You ever think about taking up baseball?"  
"I do play baseball." Laertes said with a chuckle, winding up his last one and throwing it like a pitcher would. This time, the oddly silent Horatio took the brunt. Poor Horatio, comically large sitting in their comically small inflatable swimming pool. He was sitting with his knees up to his chest, the water barely covering his ankles. The balloon hit him square in the face, knocking his glasses into the water.

"Oh, crap." Laertes said, shooting Ophelia and Hamlet a worried glance. "-- Sorry, Horatio. Wasn't aiming for your face."  
"That's okay," he said, splashing around for his glasses. Hamlet wanted to laugh, but he had a better idea.  
"-- Laertes!" He exclaimed, mimicking the kingly voice he had heard of his father in his earlier youth. "You have insulted my friend's honor! Look at the way you've hurt him!" A sweeping gesture is gestured to Horatio, who was now sprawled in the middle of the kiddie pool. Ophelia giggled with her hand covering her mouth. "You've declared _war_ against Elsinore and our people!"  
Laertes caught on. They may be teens -- too old for games, they had said previously -- but neither of the boys could resist a good old war scenario. "Oh, yeah? What are you gonna do about it?"  
Hamlet, pausing their game, walked over to his mother, who was lounging beside where they kept all of the floaties and water guns and other fun summer things like that.  
"Having fun, honey?" She asked.  
Hamlet leaned over the big box, gathering up supplies. "Yeah, mom."  
"Need anything?"  
"Nah." He shuffled away from her, carrying in his arms a bundle of water guns. 

After a few minutes when all the guns filled with water, Hamlet re-began their game. "-- I declare war, in Horatio's memory!"  
"Cool," Horatio said, yawning. "I'm dead."  
"Sometimes I can still hear his voice," Hamlet said, cupping his hand over his ear. "Urging me to avenge him!"  
Ophelia theatrically clutched her hand over her heart. "How tragic!"  
"I think it's lame," Laertes said, remaking his artillery of balloons. "Hey, Hamlet -- how are we going to decide what side Ophelia's on?"  
"I can decide!" She said hotly. "I wanna be on Hamlet's side."  
"That's not fair!" Laertes replied, just as hotly. "I can't fight alone!"

As if on perfect cue, Rosencrantz knocked on the garden gate's door, ever-so-politely. "Helloooo. Sorry we're late." He said. He grinned to see Hamlet, sitting on a rock like a king. Guildenstern followed being him, urging him through the gate impatiently. "What's going on, here?"  
"Rosencrantz! Guildenstern!" Hamlet said fondly, smiling in return. "We're playing war. Laertes killed Horatio."  
"Hi," Laertes said, waving. Horatio had fallen asleep.  
"And Ophelia abandoned his side to be with me." Hamlet explained.  
Ophelia made a finger gun at the two men. "We've got guns, see?"  
"And now we're gonna have a war, and you guys have to be on Laertes' side." Hamlet said. "You may think that we're outnumbered, but we have better technology and Horatio's ghost. Ghosts always win. Horatio!" He said, aiming carefully at the sleepy Horatio and firing a blast of icy water at his chest. Horatio, a victim once more, yelped awake.  
"What!? What!? Who won?" He said, fixing his askew glasses.  
"Horatio, you have to come back as a ghost and aid us." Hamlet said, sounding mockingly hurt that his friend didn't figure this out on his own.  
"But if I'm a ghost, I can't hold material items. They'll fall through."  
"I didn't know you got a PHD at Ghost College!" Hamlet laughed, throwing a water gun at him. "Defend Elsinore, ghost boy! FOR ELSINOOOORE!" Hamlet yelled, waking up the whole castle. Ophelia let out a triumphant battle cry, aiming her weapon at the sky. Horatio let out a less-than-thrilled cry as well, picking himself up out of the kiddie pool. 

"For... WHATEVER WE'RE FIGHTING FOR! HONOR, I GUESS!" Laertes yelled back, the castle once again reawakened. He threw a balloon up in the air. Rosencrantz and Guildenstern, rallied, shouted along with him -- not as enthusiastically as Ophelia, but not as unexcited as Horatio. 

Gertrude, giggling, was filming them. 

The two conflicting sides clashed, and many extremely iconic moments among the friend group happened. Rosencrantz got confused and threw a balloon at Guildenstern, who explained that they were on the same side. Ophelia fired her water gun straight into Laertes' mouth on accident, who choked on his own laughter (and a little water, of course). Hamlet found his way over to the hose and turned it on, making the grass around them mud-slicked and wet. Horatio got his revenge on both Laertes and Hamlet for their cruel awakenings and abuse with their water. 

At the end of the day, a bruise flowered on Horatio's temple from the water balloon attacks, Rosencrantz got copious amounts of mud in his hair, a piece of rubber was caught in Guildenstern's nose ring, Ophelia laid, humorously defeated, on the grass, and let herself enjoy the sun and the water and the mud, basking in victory (or defeat? it was unclear) while giggling, and Laertes & Hamlet had tired themselves out. Many botchy red marks appeared on Hamlet's skin where he had been hit with the stinging balloons, while Laertes was sure he had some kind of ear infection coming on. Meanwhile, Gertrude had gotten the whole thing on video, and vowed silently not to send it to Polonius, but keep it safe in her Camera Roll for later enjoyment.

"So, who won?" Laertes asked tiredly, sitting up to look at Hamlet.  
"I dunno." Hamlet said, panting, his heart still racing from the strife. "I kinda feel like both of us won. What do you think, Horatio?"  
"Laertes' side had the most casualties."  
"Ow, owww." Guildenstern winced as Rosencrantz carefully removed the rubber from the nose-ring. "Seconded."  
"I'm gonna stick with 'we both won'," Laertes said stubbornly, feeling let down by his teammates. "Ophelia? What do you think?'  
"I agree," she hummed pleasantly, helping Rosencrantz out by pouring the hose over his head. "I had fun."  
"Me too," Hamlet smiled. " _That's_ how you start the summer. Honor has been restored!" He laid down his weapon and laughed.  
"Does that mean I can pass on, now?" Horatio asked, pulling on his t-shirt over his wet chest.  
"We can _all_ pass on knowing that we fought valiantly today." Hamlet said dramatically, and the whole group smiled at the silly thought.


End file.
